Today I came to this conclusion, an epiphany if you will. That may be a stretch but it was something that had been staring me in the face for awhile. Happiness is not something that we can achieve without putting some effort into it. I started re-evaluating my life, making a laundry list in my head of things I do and what I expect from them. So many times we go around asking so much out of our lives. Yet we do nothing to get those results. How many times have we said "Why can't I just win the lottery?" but how many times do you actually play the lottery? That was(is) my life! Need results but nothing in the equation. I started coming up with things that I could do to push me in that direction. First and foremost, the biggest part of my life is my job. I work a lot, I work when I am not "working". I come home and think about work, talk about work, etc. So Step # 1 Leave work at work This is easy for a lot of people but it is something I am really working on. It's hard for me to invest so much time in something and then just forget about it. I have been invested in my job for so long that I completely forgot how much free time I could have if I could just cut that out of my life.. Watch more movies, read more books, take more pictures. The list just got bigger and bigger.
I took a nice break from the city I reside in and went home and spent time with family which was also big on the list. I try to go home as much as I can. I have sisters coming out of my ears, all lovely, funny, silly characters. The middle one of the bunch had asked me a week earlier to go ice skating with her. Something that is completely out of the ordinary for us, and to be honest it was quirky enough to get my attention. It completely fell in place with my new plan on life. Do something fun that you wouldn't normally do ...Why not?
Us being naive about the whole thing completely disregarded the fact that there are a large group of people who train to be professional ice skaters, and in fact they would probably be there that day. So there we were two girls in their mid twenties too scared to go on the ice because every one besides us was skating like it was the winter Olympics.
You know the feeling when you realize that you are about to embarrass yourself completely and it's do or die?. You hold your breathe and hope for the best! That was us! Scared shitless that these little teenage ice skaters would see us fall. To be honest it was a nice feeling to be scared again, mostly because with fear comes a need to be courageous.
Being back home was really just a nice feeling. So step # 2 was surround myself with family. I am lucky that a lot of my siblings are still young and adorable. Kids really do say the darnest things and it's great when they are clever too. The baby of the family is 10 going on 30 and could carry on a conversation with anyone. She has 6 different after school activities, which include honor roll and student council. When I was 10 I would rush home to watch TV and she gives up hours of her time to study. Kids these days I tell ya....
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